Barely two business days after New York voted to allow same-sex marriage, Glenn Beck found an excuse to attack those heathen, homo-loving New Yorkers.
On his radio show Tuesday morning Beck played the role of victim, whining about the “arrogant 25-year-olds” who he says ruined his family’s outing to Bryant Park in Manhattan Monday night.
Beck, along with his wife and one of their daughters, went to the park to watch a public screening of Albert Hitchcock’s 'The 39 Steps' as part of Bryant Park Movie Night.
According to Beck, the trio were subjected to hostile heckling (“We hate conservatives here!”) and Beck’s wife Tanya suffered a vicious attack. Wine was allegedly “kicked intentionally on to her back,” leaving her “completely wet,” Beck told his naive listeners.
But that's obviously bogus. No man on earth would let some young movie-night hipster get away with intentionally spilling wine on his wife, especially someone like Beck who conveniently had two bodyguards present to do any necessary ass-kicking on his behalf.
Of course, it wouldn't be fair and balanced to only include Beck’s narrative. Local citizen Lindsey Piscitell was sitting right behind the Becks and has a different version of events. Surprise, surprise.
“It was my friend that spilled the glass of wine on Tanya--and I can assure you that it was a complete accident,” Piscitell wrote in reaction to Tuesday’s New York Magazine article about Beck’s alleged horror story.
“As soon as the wine spilled (and I question how Tanya became soaked from a half glass of wine) apologies were made and my friends pretty much scrambled to give Tanya & co napkins--no doubt aware that it would look terrible and that their actions could be perceived as purposeful. No words were exchanged after that, as I think that it became pretty clear to Beck & co that my friends and I were doing everything in our capacity to help clean the ‘mess.’”
“These were some of the most hateful people I have ever seen,” Beck sobbed Tuesday. “All I wanted to do is go out on a blanket with my family and have dinner in the afternoon sun and sit around Americans--not like-minded Americans--and watch a movie in the park.”
Like John Bender says in the movie The Breakfast Club, "B-O-O H-O-O."
Being no stranger to dopey dramatics, Beck suggested the crowd would have lynched him if only there were a rope. Of course, there are no pictures of any noticeable hostilities, just people minding their own business.
“I swear to you,” Beck continued. “I think, if I would've suggested, and I almost did, ‘Wow, does anybody have a rope? Because there's a tree here; you could just lynch me.’ And I think there would have been a couple in the crowd that would have."
Yet, despite Beck’s imagined lynching scenario, his clan remained Monday--their resolve stronger than ever. As Beck tells it, they were the Rosa Parks of Monday night’s movie in the park. Or better yet, Jesus on crucifixion day. It’s inspirational, really.
It’s unfortunate if people behaved as poorly as Beck alleges some did. But am I surprised by it? Not at all. Do I think Beck exaggerates the severity of the hostilities? Absolutely.
That being said, Beck is the most inflammatory, controversial, shit-stirring media figure in existence. Ironically, he charged the crowd with “spewing hate,” which is precisely how he earns a living for his family.
Beck has called President Obama a “racist," said he hates 9/11 victims’ families, called Hurricane Katrina survivors in New Orleans “scumbags” and progressives “enemies of God,” fomented widespread anti-Islamic sentiment in this country, and used violent rhetoric to appeal to the ignorant, hateful folks who adore him like tricks do their pimp.
Nobody should spew hate, but Beck does it in epic proportions everyday, over the airwaves, and makes millions of dollars doing it. So if anyone should be prepared to expect some verbal backlash, it’s him.
Beck described Monday night’s crowd as the “most hateful people I've seen,” but that’s probably because the multi-millionare media mogul probably doesn’t get out and mix with the masses all that often.
But that’s how it goes. Beck is a super polarizing figure. His success wouldn’t be possible without hate. People either hate him or hate his enemies. And it’s not an accident. His shows are designed to piss people off, one way or another.
It comes down to words. Nobody was assaulted Monday night. Just as Beck has the right to take to the airwaves and build a media empire that caters to America’s blight of backwoods, brainless bumpkins who fear blacks, Muslims, Mexicans, gays, the media, science, sense and progress to the detriment of America, his critics have the same right to heckle him in the streets.
Again, bad behavior is inexcusable whether you are Glenn Beck or a rowdy, anonymous, wine-spilling Hitchcock fan. But if you stand on your soap box all day, everyday, being obnoxious, terrifying people and enraging them, and then expect to have flawless smooth sailing when you venture out amongst the segment of society that you've targeted as communists and terrorists, then you’re a dumbshit.
You reap what you sow. In the words of the great American wordsmith Robert Hunter, “If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind.”
"I'm sure it's unnecessary to point out the hypocrisy in Glen's statements that we were being hateful," Piscitell concluded in her online reaction to Beck's complaint.
"I can assure him that we don't need his sympathy. Incidentally, none of us have made a career of "spewing hate" on the radio, or any other media platform. We live our lives intolerant only of those who don't tolerate: We have chosen New York as our city for that very reason. We do things like go to Bryant Park Movie Night, and vote to legalize gay marriage. We don't taunt Glen, or his family. And we certainly don't waste our wine, even on Tanya.”
Zing!
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